The behaviour change model – how to successfully and predictably create change for the better in your life.
Every area of life is the same
Behaviour change is behaviour change. No matter what area of your life you’re trying to change, the process for doing so is the same. Of course, the actions required, time and difficulty vary, but you will always be going through the same process under the surface.
It’s simply the process of creating change.
You will find that you’ve achieved things and made changes in certain areas of your life, which have now become mundane and through the curse of knowledge you forget what it was like to ever struggle.
These are the exact same skills you need to change the area of your life you currently find an uphill battle. You have the ability within you. Creating change is simply the process of pointing those skills at the right goal, in the right way.
Why people struggle to create change
People struggle because they have a goal, a vision of where they want to be, and the reason they want to change; but don’t have a proven model to go from A to B.
They either do too much, set unrealistic expectations, try to change too many things too quickly and burn out. Or don’t know what to do, feel it’s not possible for them and never start. Or follow a stupid plan that they know is never going to work, just to say they tried and feel better about slipping back into the comfort zone they were in before.
In this post and video I’m giving you the model, which you can apply to any goal to successfully create change. If you follow the model, you literally cannot fail.
That’s a big claim, but it is 100% accurate. Truth is, if you quit trying, then you quit following the model. Keep following the model and you will succeed with certainty. Of course, that doesn’t mean it is necessarily easy, simple or quick. It takes work, time, energy, belief and desire.
The Bridge Behaviour Change Model
The Bridge Behaviour Change Model has 4 parts.
Part 1 on the left hand side is where you are now. The current situation you are in, the problems and pain associated with it, the reasons you want to change.
Part 2 on the right is your goal or dream. Where you want to get to, all of the happiness and success associated with that.
In the middle are the obstacles. The limiting beliefs, failures, struggles, scary shit, sharks, Satan and everything that you need to overcome to get from where you are now, to where you want to be.
Finally we have the bridge over the valley of failure, that takes you safely to your destination. This is your plan, and it is created based on specifically what you need to do to overcome your unique obstacles to success.
The middle is the key
Where most people go wrong in creating a plan of action is that they neglect to look at the middle part – the obstacles.
What is a great plan for someone else, will not work for you, if it does not account for the unique obstacles you have to overcome. To go from the current place on the left, to the dream place on the right; what do you need to overcome?
What works for someone else might not work for me. Stuff that works for other people works, but it won’t work for you, IF YOU CAN’T DO IT.
Find the plan that you can do, that accounts for your circumstance, and then do that. You will probably have to create your own, because this is a very individual thing.
Failing to do this is just setting yourself up for failure. You have to find out what your obstacles are in advance. If you don’t, you will just fall face first into them. That’s retarded. There is no possible way you will progress if you refuse to take a realistic look at what you need to do, and plan accordingly.
Shrink the change
If you overwhelm yourself, you quit or half follow the plan and lie to yourself. By half follow, I mean you do some of it right, and tell yourself you’re doing it.
If you cannot follow the plan, it means it is a bad plan, for YOU.
No matter how well thought out or relevant it is, if it’s too much for you to follow, it won’t work. You must shrink the change and focus on the logical next step, which you can actually implement.
Apply an 80/20 rule. Find the biggest 1 or 2 things, which have most impact for least effort or disruption, and do those. Don’t worry about everything else. Master the big rocks first. Once they’re mastered and turned into habit, then you move onto the next thing and so on down the chain.
Over the course of a few weeks you will actually have changed many things, and that will lead to a big change in your outcomes. If you tried to change them all in one go, it would simply have been too much and you would quit.
The aim is for progress, not perfection. Go from A to B, then B to C, and so on. Trying to jump from A to Z is never going to work.
Be the tortoise, not the hare.
As you make consistent, step-by-step progress you start to see results, and that build momentum, which build confidence and increases commitment. This leads to bigger actions, more results and so it cycles on in a positive feedback loop.
results – momentum – confidence – commitment – results – momentum – confidence – commitment …
Permanent and easy to implement change comes from stepping stone your way up the mountain. Immediate dramatic change requires huge levels of pain, which are not desirable for anybody, and we cannot rely on being there for everything we would like to change.
The day my Dad was diagnosed with throat cancer, he quit a 40 year smoking habit cold turkey. No nicotine patches, no hynotherapy, no withdrawals, no regression. It was simple for him, because the pain of not quitting was so obvious and so great.
You don’t want to get throat cancer before you can move forwards in your life. Apply the model, take it step by step and build momentum instead.
You can achieve anything you desire, you just need to make the plan to get there based on The Bridge Behaviour Change Model.